A fellow was very much in love with a beautiful girl. One day she told him that the next day was her birthday. He told her he would send her a bouquet of roses… one for each year of her life. That evening he called the local florist and ordered […]
Performance as lovers
Three women talk about their husband’s performance as lovers. The first woman says, “My husband is a marriage counselor, so he always buys me flowers and candy before we make love. ” The second woman says, “My husband is a motorcycle mechanic. He likes to play rough and use leather […]
A married couple should have s**
The young fellow is about to marry and asks his grandfather how often a married couple should have s**. His grandfather tells him, “When you first get married, you want it all the time, maybe several times a day; later on, maybe once a week. As you get older, you […]
Lady was sunbathing on a beach
A widowed elderly lady was sunbathing on a beach in Fort Myers, FL. She looked up and noticed that a man her age had walked up, placed his blanket on the sand next to hers and began reading a book. Smiling, she attempted to strike up a conversation with him. […]
His wife with his best friend
A man returns home and find his wife with his best friend. He takes out the gun and shoots his friend to death. His wife: “Listen, if you stay in such character, you will lose all your friends.”
I had a fight with my Wife
Air Force Approach: “Eagle 13, turn right to 330.” Eagle 13: “Roger 330.” App: “Eagle 13, I’ve been working since last night, Will you do me a favor?” Eagle 13: “Affirmative. Go ahead.” App: “Down below on your right, you’ll see a base house with yellow roof near the lake. […]
Wife packing her bags
A man comes home to find his wife packing her bags and asks her where she’s going. “To Las Vegas. I found out there are men who will pay me $400 to do what I do to you for free.” The man started packing his bags. “Where are you going?” […]
Wife goes to the doctor complaining
A man and his wife agreed on a code to use in front of their kids when they want to have s*x. The code is: “Making a call.” One day the man ask his son to tell his mother, that dad wants to make a phone call. The boy returns […]
Wont fail me in bed
A woman got married, but her husband was abusive. She got remarried and that husband ran out on her. She got married again and that husband failed in bed. Finally, she put an ad in the paper: “Looking for a man who won’t abuse me, won’t leave me, and won’t […]
Lunch at a fast-food restaurant
A man saw an elderly couple sitting down to lunch at a fast-food restaurant. He noticed that they had ordered just one meal, and as he watched, the older gentleman carefully divided the hamburger in half, then counted out the fries until each had half of them. The old man […]