A man who liked a drink was warned

A man who liked a drink was warned by his long-suffering wife that if he comes home drunk one more time she will leave him.

The next evening he is out with his colleagues after work, drinks way too much and is sick all down his jacket.

He explains that his wife is likely to leave him when a colleague says “Tell you what

you do… put twenty bucks in your inside pocket and explain that someone else was sick on you and gave you money for the cleaning bill”

After agreeing that it was a fine idea, he goes home where upon his wife spots the sick and starts to have a go at him.

He says “No, listen dear. Some chap threw up on me and gave me twenty to get it cleaned”

The wife replied “So why do you have 2 twenties in your hand?”

“Ah,” answered the man “the other twenty is from the chap that shat in my pants”