A couple going on vacation but his wife was on a business trip so he went to the destination first and his wife would meet him the next day. When he reached his hotel, he decided to send his wife a quick email. Unfortunately, when typing her address, he mistyped […]
A teenage girl had been talking on the phone for about half an hour, and then she hung up. “Wow!,” said her father, “That was short. You usually talk for two hours. What happened?” “Wrong number,” replied the girl.
A mother invited some people to dinner. At the table, she turned to her six-year-old daughter and said, “Would you like to say the blessing?” “I wouldn’t know what to say,” the girl replied. “Just say what you hear mommy say,” the woman answered. The daughter bowed her head and […]
Mother took Willie to his first concert. The conductor was leading the orchestra and directing the soprano soloist as well. Willie was greatly interested. “Mother, why is that man shaking his stick at the lady?” he asked. “Hush; he is not shaking his stick at her.” “Then what is she […]
“What’s the matter with your wife? She looks all broken up.” “She got a terrible shock.” “How was it?” “She was assisting at a rummage sale at the church and she took off her new $2 hat and somebody sold it for 30 cents.”
A high school girl, seated next to a famous astronomer at a dinner party, struck up a conversation with him by asking, “What do you do in life?” He replied, “I study astronomy.” “Dear me,” said the girl. “I finished astronomy last year.”
How did the police catch the naked man breaking into Zales? They grabbed him by the jewels.
The owner asks the clerk, “What’s with that guy over there by the wall?” The clerk says, “Well, he came in here this morning to get something for his cough. I couldn’t find the cough syrup, so I gave him an entire bottle of laxative.” The owner replies, “You idiot! […]
A man and a woman were having drinks at a business conference when they got into an argument about who enjoyed s** more. The man said, “Men obviously enjoy s** more than women. Why do you think we’re so obsessed with getting laid?” “That doesn’t prove anything,” the woman countered. […]
Grandma and Grandpa were visiting their grandkids overnight. When Grandpa found a bottle of Viagra in his grandson’s medicine cabinet, he asked about using one of the pills. The grandson said, “I don’t think you should take one. They’re very strong and very expensive.” “How much?” asked Grandpa. “$10.00 a […]
