“My mom told me the best time to ask my dad for anything was during sex. Not the best advice I’d ever been given. I burst in through the bedroom door saying, ‘Can I have a new bike?’ He was very upset. His secretary was surprisingly nice about it. I […]
A mailman is making his route. On his last day before retirement, he gets to one of the last houses when the lady of the house answers the door in a slinky negligee and says, “Today is your last day, isn’t it? Come with me; I have a surprise for […]
There was an elderly man who wanted to make his younger wife pregnant. He went to the doctor to get a sperm count. The doctor told him to take a specimen cup home, fill it, and bring it back. The elderly man came back the next day; the specimen cup […]
A mailman is making his route. On his last day before retirement, he gets to one of the last houses when the lady of the house answers the door in a slinky negligee and says, “Today is your last day, isn’t it? Come with me; I have a surprise for […]
There were 4 people in a private plane: a captain, a priest, a boy scout, and a smartest man in the world. Suddenly they heard an explosion, the pilot realized that the engine had exploded so he announced, “Dear passengers, I am afraid that there is a technical problem in […]
Boy and his teacher conversation: Boy: “Can I go to the toilet please?” Teacher: “Say your alphabet.” Boy: “abcd efgh ijkl mnoq rstu vwxy z” Teacher: “You forgot about the p.” Boy: “The p whent down my pants.”
A newly wed couple were talking. Husband: “How many boyfriends did you have before marrying me?” When his wife wasn’t answering, he said: “Don’t want to tell?” Wife: “I’m still counting!!”